Day to day life can get really boring and predictable. Obligations, responsibilities, the same schedule, the same people, places, and things day after day…. Normally I thrive on some structure and routine, until there is too much of it. Honestly, when things get too repetitive it can throw me into some overwhelming feelings of being dissatisfied with my life because it’s a Tuesday and I am tired of deciding what is for dinner. Rationally, I know I’m not essentially unhappy with my life, but the monotony of adulthood makes my mind play tricks on me. When I started to recognize these feelings becoming a problem recently, I asked myself what the unmet need was underneath them. That is the point of feelings after all, to guide you towards what you need to feel balanced or better.
When I started to look deeper at those feelings,I could see that I just needed a break. Something to interrupt the doldrums of responsibility on weekdays. I talked with my husband and he was feeling the same way, especially after his transition to a job working from home. We talked about what we could do to break up the week and settled on Wednesday as the evening we would do something outside of our normal routine. Nothing necessarily fancy, just something DIFFERENT. It’s in the middle of the week, a perfect time to have a break to help us make it to the weekend and not feel like we want to pack the car and run away screaming FTW from our overwhelming adult lives.
This is when, “Why Not” Wednesdays were born. Sometimes, this is as simple as going for a car ride in the country in the evening, other times it is dinner out someplace local. Most of the time, it involves getting out into nature, looking at something beautiful, and reminding ourselves that we are part of something bigger, not just a machine of to do lists, errands, and work.
For yesterdays “Why Not” Wednesday, we took our 20+ year old canoe to a local pond, and paddled around. We looked at camps along the shore and talked about which ones we would buy if we could, which we always do when we are on a body of water. We packed a couple of our favorite craft beers and some cheese, crackers and shrimp for dinner. It was a low stress plan and took almost no time to get ready. When we got out there it was windier than we expected, so we were working hard paddling for a little while until we got to a sandbar where we could rest for a bit. What was even cooler was someone had left a plastic outdoor bench along the shore in the sand, clearly for others to enjoy, so we sat down and enjoyed the view. It was perfect.
We just started doing this a few weeks ago, but so far it is giving us exactly what we need- a break. It is also giving us some time in a different setting, a change in routine, and a chance to spend time together. What wasn’t planned but has been a nice surprise is that we have had some of our best conversations on Wednesdays which has helped us be more connected to each other.
Most of us are so busy avoiding our feelings all of the time, that we don’t have the opportunity to hear the message they are sending us and make changes in our lives accordingly. Have you noticed the same feelings of boredom and irritation about life during the week? If you have, I hope you will give “Why Not” Wednesdays a try.
I know that yours might look different than mine. People have different resources in terms of time, money, relationships, and “things”. But no matter what your circumstances, I want to encourage you to look for a way around any limitations you might have. No extra cash to spend? Find a place to go for a walk near your home that is beautiful. Have kiddos? Get them involved. Make dinner a blanket picnic in the backyard with whatever you have on hand. Peanut butter and jelly in the backyard? yes please. Or maybe the kiddos have some ideas that the family could enjoy. No one to spend time with? Change up your routine anyway. Sit on your front porch and read if you usually watch TV or reach out to a friend and see if they want to have a visit. You may not be able to remove any barriers you have to doing something fun or creative, but you can challenge yourself to find a way to worm around them.
Listen to your feelings, find a way to meet the unmet need, feel a little bit better. Good mental health works like that. One simple choice at a time.
#whynotwednesdays
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